Eddie & Gil on ‘The Art of Marriage’

 

Eddie & Gil: Married June 30, 1979

We will be celebrating 31 years of marriage June 30.  After a four year courtship,  when we were 16 and 17 years of age, where we only got to see one another on Sundays surrounded by  5 brothers chaperoning, we never have taken our love or our marriage for granted. 

Here are some of the ingredients that have made our marriage a success:

  • trusting one another –never a doubt;  
  • there is always a selflessness – we think of one another first and it balances itself out beautifully;
  • knowing when to lead and when to follow (i.e. great dancers);
  • being one another’s best friend, lover, spouse, cheerleader,  coach, and biggest fan;
  • having a sense of humour and making use of it (i.e. lots of laughter);
  • accepting there are many imperfect moments and days and that it is part of our learning and growing; and,
  • knowing  in our heart and our gut that we are meant for one another – no matter what comes our way we can deal with it together.

We take time and enjoy one another’s company. We go on dates and did this all through out our marriage including when our kids were little.  We love travelling together. We have learned to take the planned and the unplanned in stride.  We have fun. We do lots of laughing, especially through the stressful moments.  Gilbert has a great sense of humour, laughs at his own jokes, which in turn makes me laugh. :-). When one of us takes life too seriously, we find ways to stay positive. Gilbert brings me flowers for no reason, just because he knows I love getting flowers. He knows I love pink champagne and chocolates. That’s all part of enjoying life.

When life is imperfect, and believe us, we’ve had our share of personal challenges, we deeply trust that it will work out, and that we will get through it because we love one another. There is no one else we want to go through life with.   When life happens and there is frustration or hurt, we verbalize our disappointments, and when our expectations are not met, we don’t get stuck in the “drama”. We move forward.  We  are always careful about what we say, and we choose our words. We want to make sure we can later apologize and make up, and not leave scars behind.

Often we are teased by family and friends about how we are still in love after all these years.  We are always very comfortable being affectionate with one another, and profess our love and commitment.

 A few of the greatest, magical moments of our lives together:

  • our wedding day;
  • our honeymoon in Hawaii and the freedom to be together;
  • the birth of our children (Kristle and Khorie);
  • the day our son and God decided he would live and be a part of our family;
  • the many celebrations as a family including birthdays, anniversaries, and graduations over the years;
  • when our children recognize the best in themselves; and,
  • when we see the “best of ourselves” in our children.

Our Art of Marriage is working each day and giving the best of ourselves to each other. It is taking the journey with love, tears, and many joys. It is growing the distance together.  Life has ebbs and flows, and we look forward to many happy days ahead. We know we have the love and trust to get through any challenge that comes our way. As long as we are together.

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