This morning I was getting my daily fix of LoveLife and have to say a little something about names.
About Names: Yep seeing your name in print does “validate you in a way that moves from the inside”. Someone once told me that I had “name love”. Yeah so? What’s wrong with that? Should I hate my name? Well considering the person it was coming from (he did hate his name) – so maybe he expected everyone else to feel the same way about their name.
For me my name is inextricably linked to my identity. Over the past few months, I have given this concept quite a bit of thought. People have asked me, “So now that you are getting married, how are you going to deal with the name change business?” Well…since I am only legally allowed to have two last names and I already have two last names, no matter how you slice it, it looks like something’s gotta change. QUELLE PROBLEME. Having to choose which of my family names to drop is impossible. I am both a Calisto and a Tavares. To take one of those names away would be dishonourable. To remove them both would simply be wrong. So this is what I figured. If I am Kristle Calisto-Tavares before I get married then surely I am Kristle Calisto-Tavares after. C’EST VRAI. So that’s how it will be. Plus we’re getting married in Quebec and there they borrow from the French tradition – women keep their maiden names. PROGRESSIF.
And the kids? Well we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. I will say this: they too will have “name love” because we will put as much thought into their names as I know my parents put into mine.